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GB LC Masters, Manchester,

23-26 April 2004
"Participants" Meet Report

Two swimmers (Teazy a.k.a. Golden Balls (future refs GB) and The Doctor) and two intrepid supporters (Gayle and Johanna, one of her blood line, and it was obvious since they both had the Geordie Gene for Scariness - ask GB!!!!!) were in Manchester at the weekend for the British Long Course champs.

Mr Teaz (first year in C group) was particularly successful pillaging 5 golds and a silver (the Romans obviously knew what they doing when they built the wall to keep such people out!). We narrowly missed out on a Nomads 1, 2 in the 200m backstroke (namely because I didn't enter the event..........) but in all other events participation was good. Admittedly I also didn't trouble the split takers since I only elected for the one length events. However, reaction times were recorded and I can happily report I have the reactions of a person somewhere between the age of 65 and 80 based on the time it took for my feet to the leave the block!

Times were OK overall (i'm afraid I'll need GB to fill in the details of his times as I can remember some of them but not all and wouldn't like to do him a disservice). I managed 34.5 for 50m back and 32.2 for fly.

Unfortunately the comp was very long and over-ran by far too much each day e.g. GB swam his 50m f/s at 21:55 (when the session was supposed to have been over by 21:00). This precipitated a one-man campaign by GB to ban the 400m events from the sprint meet - he mentioned this to more than one official over the weekend and after a while you could see them "looking busy" whenever they saw him coming!

We partook of a top curry (organised by Trafford Metro) in one of the restaurants on the "curry mile" in Rusholme - even Gayle had some curry and I reckon by the end of this year we'll have her eating jalfrezi's with the best of 'em.

Other things of note? Oh yes - was a bit worried what the flush of success had done to GB when he described a funny slogan he'd seen on the condom machine in the gents and shortly afterwards suggested we stop at Gretna on the way back "for a fish supper" - well I'm not the new Mrs Teaz so I needn't have worried!!!!!

We may have recruited a new swimmer - a lady who's into distance freestyle apparently.

So in ending this brief summary of a long weekend I hope you'll join me in congratulating GB on his excellent performances and let's see if we can't get a good turnout for Gateshead in the summer.

The Doctor

ps note to myself, when rooming with GB remember to bring ear plugs - he might say he sleeps like a baby but he means a baby buzz saw!!

pps the World Masters Games (golf Norrie?) are in Edmonton next year

Nick Andrews

Nice on Nick. Not wholly accurate but a good read nonetheless...

Can I add the following:

There were 20 heats of the 400 free on Saturday morning, we timed our arrival 2 hours into the session at 11am, there were still 4 heats left! The entire session lasted 5 hours!!!

Emily Reid, one of the feared trio of sisters, appeared swimming for Maidenhead. She says hi to you all.

Able support was also provided on Saturday by Mrs and Mr Hood (aka Maggie and John). The question is John, if you could make it to the pool then why the hell didn't you enter the meet in the first place (and yes I know I wouldn't have won the 200 free otherwise).

Lessons learned during the weekend:

Manchester car parks are very expensive.
6 hours sleep, much curry and Cobra lager does not make for a "comfortable"
100 free on Sunday morning.
Never deny Gayle's cousin a drink...
Never make polite conversation with Gayle and Joanna in a restaurant
("Bored already")...

Iain Teaz

...and never get changed out of your "tights" in a first aid room with a 1 inch gap down the middle of the doors that "the doctor" can peer through!!

No-one's yet mentioned Nick's amazing contribution to the world of fashion either....

(1) Sat night, back to the hotel to get "changed", ahem, well, sit in the chair with the remote control until it's time to go out 'cos he's only brought one pair of jeans and why bother changing his good t-shirt...I mean it wasn't THAT hot on the poolside was it?
(2) Sun lunch...it was a hot day when walking to the pub for lunch, so shorts and t-shirts were acceptable, but with brown leather ankle boots??? Picture the scene, red shorts black (Ricky Tomlinson!) t-shirt and brown ankle boots!! I can hear the sound of those fashion police sirens approaching now.....

And one word to you TEAZY...."WHAT?????"

Gayle Shotton